OKAY.

I AM BACK.... ON DEVIANTART.

for the moment. haha. XD

I've decided to get off my butt (or.... stay on it?) and start to come back to dA for.... no reason. 8D -was bored- XD'

so yeah... dunno if I'll be actively posting much art up here.... I'm still awfully lazy...

but now that I'm done with school (HAH. TAKE THAT UNDERCLASSMEN. I HAVE GRADUATED. XP)

maybe I'll get some up before I leave? hmm. :3 might work nicely. 8D

1. What does your deviantart name mean and why.
.... uhh... it's a song title from KH2 OST. one of the emo moments Riku has. :3'.... one of many. XD! but we all love riku~~ <3

2. What fandom where you obsessed with when you joined and what are you into now?
eeehh... final fantasy? XD I still love them... ESPECIALLY DISSIDIA -dies- .... butz is so funny! XD and zidane and onion knight are so cute ;____; kuja's amazingness~~ fo sho~ ;o

3. How many watchers do you have now?
uhh 20... well 19... it appears that one of mine got banned. D: !! oh noes! D:

4. Name 3 of your favorite artists on DA
... all mah peeps are my fav'd. :3

5. Do you comment, fav, or both?
hmm... both. I like people to comment on me, so I comment on them~ ;o

6. Do you participate in clubs' contests here on DA?
... no. I'm hardly on da as it is. XD

7. What is your most popular deviation?
eeeh... it seems color'd haseo takes the cake with 154 views. go haseo!! >D!!

8. What are you favorite non-anime TV shows?
... dang. D: iCarly? XD that show's amazing~ <3

9. What are the things you wish you could draw better?
hmm... lotsastuffs. like.. PEOPLE. D:< why do I fail? -flail-

10. Summer or winter?
depends where it is. if it's up here at home... then summers for sure. XD they're slightly nippy... but nothing like the random snow we get like.... NOW. D:< ! thecrap?

11. Rain or Sun?
rain makes me happy~~ <3 why is it such a depressing thing? D: ! I love the rain. ;___; reminds me of swimming.

12. What's your favorite type of music?
J-rock! well... 'New Century Electrock' is officially LM.C's... so I suppose that. XD but J-rock in the whole grouping. :3

13. PC or Mac?
Linux > all ... except next year I'll have a mac. for school purposes~ ;o

14. Anime or Manga?
hmm... I'm more of a reader... so usually manga... but since I got my ipod... anime's been shoved in there. I'm FINALLY gonna finish DGM!! and watch all code geass! XD bahahhaa!!

15. Coke or Pepsi?
.... water. ' but if I HAD to choose.... coke. it's less sugary than pepsi. XD' and I come from an anti-pepsi family. ''

16. Read or TV?
read. but I'm usually on the internet... hey wait... I read on the internet too... does that count?

17. How many hours a day do you spend on DA?
according to the stats... I upload a new deviation every 25.6 days... so you can go from that. XD' I usually get on only when I upload... every here and there when I don't. XD lol

18. Name a hidden talent.
... :3 nothing~ ;o

19. Flash or traditional cartoons?
I love them both, but there's the nostalgia that comes with the traditional. :3 just like mario! he'll never die!! !

20. What is your favorite fast food restaurant?
I looove the subway... I've been craving it lately... cuzuh my cousin. ;___; we were talking about it last night -sob-

21. What are your top 3 favorite books?
-Lord of the Rings
-Eragon series.
-any DekKer books. :3 he's brilliant~~ <3

22. Wii or Playstation?
playstation has final fantasy. and.... toa. XD <3

23. Name 3 of your favorite bands
-LM.C (duh) XD, ._.' uhh...
-Pierrot? I've begun to like them a lot recently. :3 mostly the songs that Aiji writes... unknowingly. XD'
-and uhh. D: !! alice nine. ? I dunno. >.<' my ipod's full of soundtracks! XD -flail-

24. Are you a fast, slow, or medium typer?
.... I think I'm fast. according to a few online wpm things... I type at least 90wpm? that's pretty good, ne? :3

25. Do you like Denny's?
... uhh... I dunno. XD mama hates denny's. so we never went that I remember. XD''

26. What is your favorite emoticon?
? XD that one makes me lol. XD

27. What is your favorite type of pie?
pumpkin. only pie I like/eat. XD

28. Have you ever stayed up for 24 hours?
indeed. :3' ... but then after like.... 27 hours, mama told me to sleep. XD

29. Do you go on YouTube alot?
not as much as paulina -coff- ' but I'm on there a lot. :3

30. Are you a member on any other sites besides DA?
uhh... haaai. gaia, fanfic, lj, youtube, uhh... ._.' I think that's it...? XD

31. Do you cosplay?
I wish ;___; my current want is to be Agito... from Air Gear. cuz he's so amazing. XD his language isn't, though. XD!!

32. Fruits or sweets?
fruits. sweets are... gross. >.<' once in a while sure... but like.. ew. >.<' I could eat fruit all the time.

33. Buttered, plain, or salted popcorn?
.... I don't eat popcorn anymore... and my dislike of them is only feul'd by the little chitlins we got running around at work. XD''

34. Have you skipped school?
.... no... I've skipped a class twice... I think. '' hurray for college! XD

35. Have you been on a plane?
many times when we were little. then after 9/11 it's like... >.<' every now and again... cuzzuh the costs and the TIME it takes to get ON the plane. >.<' laaame. D:

36. Have you swum in an ocean?
uhh not swimming... but I've played in the ocean. got a hecka nasty burn on my back too! XD stupid LA. :3'

37. Have you been ice skating?
yup yup. ! it's fun~~ <3 almost like roller blading... but more cool~ ;o I wish I could be good at it, though. ;___;

38. Favorite vacation spot
.... we don't do vacation spots? ._.' we just sit there... XD' probably where a buncha family goes, though. :3 our family's fun. XD!

39. Ever been on tv?
yup. :3 I miss that museum.... -forgets what it was- :3 but we were on the news... just saying hi to the locals in Portland.

40. Favorite salad dressing?
Ranch? classic~ ;o

41. What do you do to relax?
sleep. :3 and watch tv... and sit on the internet for hours on end. XD

42. What is the last film you saw in the theaters?
uhh... probably Wall-e. yes... no one likes to go to movies with me -sob- ... NO WAIT. madagascar 2. lol... how could I forget? XD

43. Favorite Sandwich?
subway sandwich? or in general? cuz I don't quite like the normal ones... but subway... i like the spicy italian. ! <3 pepperouni! XD

44. If you could go anywhere in the world...
... my dream is japan ;____; -sob-

45. Favorite time of the day?
hmm.... dusk, I think. :3 it's pretty.

46. What did you want to be when you were little?
... .-.' I dunno. XD I think I more wanted a family than think about what I wanted to do in life. XD!

47. What do you want to be now?
Film industry. probably editor. :3

48. If you could eat with one person, who would it be?
... does it have to be one? ;___; maya and Aiji can count as one, right? XD they're always... THERE. XD!

49. What character would you hate to be stuck in a room with?
hate...? Sakura. from Naruto... she's such a bum. XD no one likes her. XD -dies- EVEN IN SHIPPUDEN! XP

50. When is your birthday?
the day I was born, silly~

51. Favorite type of ice cream?
... classic vanilla~ <3

52. Last book you read?
... I'm still reading Brisingr... stupid school. D:< -kicks-

53. Which store would you max out a credit card at?
uhh.... probably some techy store. XD' not picky about a certain one... OR Borders! that place'll have me running everywhere~~ <3

54. Do you buy / sell / both on ebay?
naaah. :3 I don't got anything to sell, and I'm too poor to get stuffs. XD

55. What is the most annoying thing people ask you?
... eehh "what are you?" XD human, of course~ ;o lol.

56. Favorite all time tv show?
.... :{ I dunno. >.<' probably iCarly... XD

57. What was your favorite show as a kid?
... Arthur, I think. :3 mama loves it even now. XD''

58. What are you listening to right now?
LM.C - Little Fat Man Boy (such an amazing song. XD the video's just pure LOL XD but it's got a nice story. :3)

59. What is the last thing you ate?
... some pasta last night.... forgot breakfast ;___; -sob-

60. If you were a crayon what C O L O U R E D would you be?
probably something boring. XD but I do love darkish blue. :3 or vincent-red. :3

61. What is the first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
hair, then the eyes. XD hair has gotta be good. XD

62. Favorite sport to play?
swimming. :3 only sport I love to do~ XD

63. Favorite Day of the Year?
I love Chinese New Year. I get money. XD!! and my birthday. XD'' but Christmas is always the best. :3

64. Hugs or Kisses?
I love getting hugs, but kisses from those you love are always the best. :3

65. Chocolate or vanilla?
banirra~ ;o fo sho~

66. Favorite Board Game?
uhh... probably catch phrase with davy. XD it's so much fun. XD!! "Black Beauty? I thought it was a racist remark! D: !" XD!!

67. Favorite smells?
fresh-outta-da-oven-cinnamon rolls. oishii~~ <3

68. What inspires you?
God. :3 all the stuff that he made... it's like.. amazing if you think about it. D: !! sugee. ;___;

69. Do you have any piercings?
haaaai. earlobes~~ <3

70. How many siblings do you have?
one little sister. :3 who's totally gonna miss me next year. XD!!

71. Bacon Bits or croutons?
croutons~~ <3 I munch on them all the time.

72. Favorite Day of the Week?
I love saturdays. that's the party days... XD

73. Favorite phrase?
._.' uhh.... I dunno. XD''

74. Favorite Restaurant?
Old Country Buffet. seriously! you just pay to sit down, and it's all you can eat!! XD!!

75. Favorite animal?
I always wanted a siberian tiger when I was little ;___; stupid Jasmine gets everything. D:<!! but now... I love the little kittens. :3 preferably black kittens. XD

76. Favorite thing to do outside?
.... nothing. D:< it's too cold up here. -sob-

77. Favorite thing to do when it's raining?
watch it.... '' -lame-

78. Favorite Disney character?
I love wall-e ;___; he's so cute -sob-

79. Do you like coffee? If so, what is your favorite brand?
nope. :3' I love the smell... but I hate the taste. XD''

80. Tag 6 people
tag yourself. XP -lazy-

Now for a total change of subject: A RETARD QUIZ!

[x] I have walked into a glass/screen door.

[] I have tripped on my shoelace and fallen on my face.

[x] I have choked on my own spit.

[x] I've seen the Matrix a bunch of times and still don't get it.

[] I type only with my pointer fingers.

[] I have accidentally caught something on fire.

[] I've told a cop to piss off and gotten screwed for it.

[] I attempted to sip out of a straw but it accidentlay went into my nose, rather than my mouth.

[] Sometimes when I think of something funny, I laugh out loud and people look at me weird.

[] I've caught myself drooling.

[] I've accidentally caused an explosion.

[x] If someone says the word "fart", I can't help but laugh

[] I've turned into a "do not enter" one way road plenty of times.

[x] Sometimes I just stop thinking & zone out...

[] It is POSSIBLE to lick your elbow.

[] I just tried to lick my elbow.

[x] People often shake their heads and walk away from me.

[] People often tell me to use my "inside voice".

[] Gum has fallen out of my mouth while talking

[x] I've used my fingers to do simple math.

[] I've jumped off a moving vehicle.

[] I ate a bug for $5 or less.

[x] I'm taking this test when I should be doing something more important.

[] I repost chain letters because I'm scared of what they threaten will happen if I don't.

[] I've done something really stupid while I was drunk.

[] I've run around naked when I was drunk. [ ... pon? XD]

[] I've run into a golf cart tire when I was drunk

[] I've searched all over the place for something, and then realized it was in my hand the whole time.

[] I accidentally break a lot of things...

[] My friends know not to use big words around me.

[] My friends like me because I'm fun to laugh at.

[x] I move my head to the side when I'm confused

[x] Sometimes I start telling a story and suddenly forget what I'm talking about.

[x] I've fallen out of my chair before.

[] When I'm laying in bed, I sometimes stare at the ceiling and try to find pictures and words in the texture.

Total score [10]

Once you get your answer multiply by three
30.....

1.) Name three of the most influential songs of your childhood.

childhood? D: ! I don't remember that far!!
1. the 'cartoon' song... :[ we could never remember who sang it and what
it's called. XD heh.
2. avalon's "testify to love" :3' always made me happy. XD
3. ahh... "live out loud" I think it's called? by Michael W. Smith. :3'
... pretty sure. XD

2.) Name three of the most influential songs to you currently.

well that's loads easier. >D
1. Run by Hillsong
2. Break Free by Hillsong (totally the greatest~ ;o)
3. ...with VAMPIRE by LM.C (Aiji + Maya guitar skills influenced me to
learn? -cough- XD that counts, right? plus it's flippin' rad. >D)
dang... that really was kinda hard. ;___; only three... -sob-

3.) Select one of your characters. Is there a song you connect to him / her vocally?

'one of your characters' D:< maybe I dun have one.... XP

but if I did.... "...with VAMPIRE" would be the song for him. >D yes... a male.... because that song is rad.... and is totally a man song. >D ... -cough-


4.) But what about you? Is there a specific artist/band you've always liked, no matter what?

LM.C!!!!!!!!! ftw. >D bahahhaa... liked 'em since... ahh.... two winters ago. XD' lawlz. <3 a few months after they debuted. :3'

5.) Put your entire playlist on shuffle. List the first five songs that are shown.

Assault of the Silver Dragons - the Black Mages (THEIR THIRD ALBUM. >D)
Karma - BUMP OF CHICKEN (gotta love 'em. >D)
Shino - .hack//G.U. (.... stupid shino... >.>' and ovan... ack... he's a
rapist. D:< I swear. poor haseo D: !)
...with VAMPIRE - LM.C (HOW DID IT KNOW?! -loves-)
Orochimaru's Theme - Naruto (.... -sigh- I wish I could play the organ
like that.... at all would be nice. ;___; )

6.) Make a band acronym out of the letters of your name.

D:< no fair!! my name is flippin' long!

a lice nine. (there you go, vania. XP)
L M.C !! (yaaay. XD)
E pik High ( go koreans! >D but they aren't as fun as nihongo~ ;o kpop XP)
T he Black Mages (it counts. D:< "The" IS part of their name -sob- )
H illsong (yush. >D)
E XILE (... again koreans? !)
A AA (hehe... XD Q ftw)

7.) The best instrument in your opinion:

..... ;___________; TOO MANY TO CHOOSE.

ahh.... I think..... my first love is the piano... ;____; though I've fallen madly in love with the harpsicord and FULLBLOWNPIPEORGAN.... piano... <3


8.) A song that you cannot stand:

"Wake me up when september ends" .... >.>' need I say more? that song is just OVERPLAYED AND GROSS. D:< .... and repetative. XD' -coff-

9.) Word Association:

Psychedelic: Lover...? go Pierrot! XD
Anger: RED CARPET GOING ON - alice nine. .... it's scary ;___; don't think
it's really angry, though... but it's scary. ;___;
Dragon: Assault of the Silver Dragons - The Black Mages (:3)
Water: Water - FFVII:AC :3' ... -coff- they seem to have gotten slightly
UNoriginal when it came to that title. XD haha.
Evil: Orochimaru's Theme - Naruto...? XD it's evil... but awesome!! ;___;
Apple: theWORLD - nightmare.... because... apple = shinigami = death note
= death note anime = opening theme = theWORLD. :3' there you go~ ;o
Choices: Yellow Beauty - LM.C ....? can I do that? XD -coff- it reminded
me. :[ emos song. D: !
Bicycle: SORA NAMIDA IRO!!<3 "bicycle it goes" >D bahaha.... yet again
LM.C -coff-

10.) And last but not least, tag list five people with songs that remind you of them.

heh. >D

- marble-s - LM.C.... duh. it's your ringtone, darling~ ;o

- Doctor Who opening.... because that's you. XP

- Healer - Hillsong (don't ask. :[ it just stuck. ;__

- fighting dreamers (also known as GO!) .... because I
can. XD hah. and you're my fellow Narutard. >D bahhaa.

- Emo - ... because we sign it ALL THE TIME. >D

so news?

CAN'T GO TO CAMP.

mega-suck-age right there...

I mean....

first... mum's like "alright... camp~" then she looked at the price "... well... it's too expensive... no."

so that got me depressed and frustrated... but I perservere, right? so I asked her again later.... "well... I'm not sure..." and then again... "... I guess you COULD go... if you pay with your own money"

so I was totally ready for that, right? and I told my cousin about it... and was getting pumped for going to Ghormely for the last time... and possibly the last time at summer camp in general.... as a student anyways (I wanted to be a leader next year... but I'm not sure if I'll be here for camp next year. :[ depends on college and crap)

then I'm talking about it with my mum in Cali... and she's like "I never said you could go" .... yeah, she did.... but she's just... difficult... >.>' then I kept annoying her about it... and she said "I need to think about it"...

and guess what?

deadline for early bird is TODAY.

.... WAS today....

and I got no answer...

so this means no last summer ghormely camp for me... even though I was totally willing to pay my own money out of the flipping bank...

it's not even 'just any old camp' ... it's a spiritual experience... and my time to just let go and be... me.

not the eldest daughter who needs to do chores around the house

not the student who is going between struggling in school to totally mastering it

not the person who has NO idea what she wants to be in life, or wanting to major in

not the person who needs to balance her life with more reading

not the girl who is in love with LM.C and gets excited everytime she hears them

not anything.

I'm just God's child-- nothing more... nothing less.

camp was my release... my time to just go off and talk to God... be a kid, and enjoy life to the fullest...

and now I can't go and just be myself.

and my mother doesn't UNDERSTAND that I really WANT to go and just be myself in front of God, to play with him, and hang out with his people...

it's not that she doesn't want to understand... she CAN'T understand.

she's never BEEN to camp... never had that exilarating feel of just letting go of life and walking around places and just feeling God right there with you. She doesn't get the intense and deep spiritual talks that always touch more than one person's heart in small groups after sermons. She doesn't get the fun and enjoyment of pranking other cabins.

She doesn't get it.

so it's not her fault... but it still frustrates me that she's keeping me from feeling it again... despite the huge price increase...

I mean really... I was going to pay it myself... what's the harm in that? I LOVE camp... I LOVE the people going... I LOVE my church... I LOVE God... I LOVE everything about it... (well... maybe not the sleep-loss... but it's totally worth it. XD)

so I'm really upset and sad that I can't go this summer... she said that we could go camping... just the family... but it's not the same...

we, as a family, SUCK when it comes to being Godly and that stuff...

pretty much everything I learned... was from my church... not from home... so I have a connection with my church... we're a community...

:[... I needed to get that out there.... XD' -feels a little better-

now I need to read loads and loads and LOADS of angst to make myself feel better.... :3' and listen to craploads of LM.C... :3' they're so beautiful~ <3

<3